Bordeaux Living

Dinner at Lauren's

Lauren had us over for dinner on Thursday night. We are going to try to make it a weekly rotation. College students abroad trying to host a dinner may sound a little terrifying, but I see it as a learning experience. Luckily, if the food turns out bad, the wine is almost always good. It's a win win.

Poulet à la crème. mmmmmmm.

Belly full I walk home slowly and took some pictures of my street at night.

Grocery Shopping

Last week I posted about how we discovered this overpriced, nevertheless amazing, asian supermarket. All week I was itching to return after googling some recipes. (New favorite website: www.allrecipes.com You can save your recipes all in one place! Genius, I tell ya.) We woke up bright and early and made the trek out to no-man's-land Bordeaux. Boy, was it worth it.

As promised, I took as many pictures as I could remember.

Around Town

On the walk home from my tram stop, I took advantage of the dry weather and snapped some more shots.

In the Kitchen

Marina and I have been trying new things to remind us of home. Last week it was pancit. My French mom Joana was in love. It was almost, almost I said, as good as grandma's.

This weekend we tried carrot cake. Unfortunately, it was not just like grandma's! I don't know what we were thinking. We should have started with something basic like chocolate cake, actually maybe cake in it's entirety was probably out of our league. I mean, you've gotta walk before you run. Silly girls.

Erasmus

We ditched our failed carrot cake and headed to the welcome back erasmus party. With 3 euro mixed drinks how could you go wrong? Don't worry it was a Saturday ;)

Top 5 Foreigner Moments - at the Table

There are often times I find myself noticing just how foreign I am. This blog will be dedicated to those moments specifically when eating.

5. Endives: What are they, why are they in everything, and most importantly, why are they hard and taste like nothing?

4. Breakfast: I'm still hungry.

France:

USA:

3. Exclamation in Pain: If I bite my tongue or burn my finger, never will my first reaction be "aie!"

2. Mayonnaise: There never needs to be that much of any condiment.

1. Cleaning My Plate. Wiping up the last of the juices and remnants on my plate with a baguette will never be the last bite that I want to take.

Adaptations

Since returning to France I have been trying to find the even balance between being a foreigner but still making a home here. I felt like I would have more French friends and be living a completely French life by now. But as always, life is not black and white.

New Homes

One of my besties here, Lauren, just moved into a new place. She lives with another Californian and the proprietor. While the owner was gone this weekend, Lauren and her roommate Arielle threw a couple parties.

The first night was such a blast. The party was filled with Californians and Frenchies and Brits. It was so nice. I realized how much my french has improved. We joked and, of course, drank into the wee hours.
The second night was a bit crazy. Things got a little out of hand and the next day Lauren's proprietor came home early. Suffice it to say it was a disaster.

Relationships

Saturday night we went out with the British girls to have a girl night. We trash talked boys - it didn't matter what their race, origin, nationality, all we under scrutiny and as far as we were concerned, all we guilty.

Just the night before I was feeling like I had nearly failed in France, because I don't have any close French girl friends and I have been here for around 6 months. However, on second look, I have accomplished so much! I have these amazing friends, who cares if they are californian and british; they are the best. We can rely on each other, we can have the craziest, most fun nights, boring long classes and tests, but most of all we can all relate to each other. Yes, it's convenient we speak the same first language, but it goes far beyond that. We all suffer from stupid foreigner mistakes, longing for home, and facing cultural and/or academic challenges.

So what they're not French? We would have never found each other if it wasn't for being in France and studying abroad. I came here to learn other cultures and make friends and as far as I'm concerned, I am doing that. Of course I would love to have more French friends, but it's hard to find sincere people and befriend them no matter what country you are in.


Food

Marina and I made the trek to the only big asian store in Bordeaux (which isn't really even in Bordeaux) which took nearly an hour, but it was well worth it. We were overwhelmed when we walked in the door. Pocky sticks, tropical drinks, lumpia wrappers, clear noodles - actually all asian noodles of all types, and many many more. We were like kids in a candy store folks. We were all over the place. We came on a whim, hence no list, and we came out with several things we probably could have gone without.

I ran into a couple of frenchie friends who offered a ride home. I didn't want to impose so I told them we didn't mind taking the bus home. Little did we know there were strikes --  yeah, strikes? In France? Hmm go figure.. We made it home nearly two hours later. Success! Regardless, when I got home with all my loot, all the effort was worth it.

Joana had dinner ready for us, and after we ate we made banana lumpia for dessert. Oh la la it was almost as good as mom's. This week we are going to tackle pancit and savory lumpia. I can't sleep just thinking about it! It's going to be like Christmas (literally, because we have those things on Christmas).

In Conclusion 

Yes, I am in France and going to a French university, but that isn't all. My classes are filled with foreigners and French students alike. We are all adapting. It's our differences that bring us together. It is true that we Californians are in France and our best friends are British... and I am so lucky to have them all in my life.

First Week Back

Sick

I got sick, again! Oh la la I was sick just before I left Bordeaux then I picked up a severe cold on the plane back to Bordeaux. Note: if you are sick do NOT go to WebMD.com, it is a hypochondriac's worst nightmare. I thought I was on my death bed after googling my symptoms! It was knife to the throat status, but luckily I had a few days to rest before school and I am feeling so so much better. Still alive here!

Being Back

Coming back was so crazy. Edouard was so sweet to pick me up from the airport. (He actually works as an air traffic controller and was getting off as my plane landed!) Tired, jetlagged, and starting to feel my cold, I relaxed in Edouard's car. As we drove through the foggy city I remembered why I fell in love with Bordeaux.

Classes

Classes have slowly started and I am trying to get into the swing of things. I know I am here to study abroad and all, but sometimes I feel like my classes are getting in the way of my abroad part! Nevertheless my list of semester resolutions are as follows:

• allocate more studying time
• be prepared - review notes and dates frequently
• try to travel more
• take more pictures 

Taking classes in a French university has definitely taught me patience, new ways of learning and taking notes, but above all it has taught me to allow myself some slack. At UC Davis, anything less than an A (even an A-) was not acceptable. I would torture myself sick for perfect grades. Here, I realized life is so much bigger, and also too short, for that kind of mindset. I'd rather be happy and relaxed than so wound up chasing perfection. 

Random Questions

1. When are they going to develop teleportation?
2. Are January Sales in France a national sport for French women? 
3. Is hospital food better than airplane food?

Reflextions at LAX

(Sorry for the delay, internet access was pretty much non-existent between my flights)

Isn’t it crazy how life happens? In the past five months I have learned to either passively watch life as it goes by or actively make it happen. I spent an incredible four months in Bordeaux. I experienced things I had only dreamed of and met amazing people I could have only hoped existed. I tried, I failed; I tried, I succeeded. Either way, I learned so much about life, about the world, and most of all, about myself.

When I came home for Christmas, I was so happy to be home and back to what was familiar. Furthermore, I was able to appreciate my culture, my family and my home, more than I ever had before. Things that flash in my mind are my soft bed with Pierre, my warm shower, eating my favorite foods with my friends and Family, and enjoying the sun. My last blog included every thought that was eating away at my mind. I was scared to leave my safe and comfortable home. I didn’t want to leave my family and friends. After I posted my blog, I received an email from a friend from elementary school who is now in the military. He signed up his life to be sent anywhere in the world to service our country. He reminded me he did it to see the world and experience something he couldn’t in Sacramento. I felt ashamed that I was complaining about going back to France - a country I had chosen, and that I very much grew to love. All the support my friends and family gave me just solidified my decision; thank you.

So here I am, so lucky to be sitting here in an airport reflecting about my two worlds. First, there is my real home where I am loved and always welcome, and secondly there is my temporary home where my new friends, who have become my new, yet slightly dysfunctional, family. I love them both whole-heartedly. I selfishly want them both, which is absolutely impossible.

I hate flying. I hate leaving. I hate not being with Pierre. But I am fighting my fears one more time to enjoy the last of this beautiful life I have found in France. Adventures are challenging. They force us to face the areas in our mind we avoid at all costs, leave the comfortable known, and push ourselves to limits we didn’t know were fathomable. It’s absolutely terrifying. Then again, it’s absolutely exhilarating.

Random, Lost, Depressing Thoughts

Disclaimer

I'm going to step away from my usual blogging habits and post something a little more bizarre and a lot less entertaining than usual. You are more than welcome to stop reading right now, really. I just felt like letting all my thoughts out would help me organize them, and maybe have a clue as to what I am feeling right now.

Thoughts

When I arrived home a couple weeks ago, it was a little strange. Most things were the way I had left them, my family, my friends, my home, etc. However, I felt sort of out of place. It was weird to get in my car just to go to the grocery store, or any other small errand. Talking to a cashier in English threw me off. I couldn't remember how to work my old phone. Going to sleep early and waking up even earlier was such a pain. The list went on and on.

I was experiencing reverse culture shock. It sounds so ridiculous to be shocked by your own culture. It's not like the entire time I was in Bordeaux I was feeling like it was my culture. I knew reverse culture shock existed, but I didn't think it was common and furthermore that it would happen to me.

I finally got adjusted to life in California 2011. I enjoyed spending time with my family and friends, listening to "new" music on the radio, taking in as much of my favorite foods as possible, going outdoors because the warm sun was too irresistible and sleeping in.

Coming home was truly a blast. Even when I was just lounging around in my sweat pants at home, I felt so content to be home. Now I am questioning going back. I know I have to. I want to, I do, but at the same time I don't. I don't want to miss my parents and Pierre and my friends and everything that I associate with home. Being homesick is arguably one of the worst feelings in the world. That is why I am sitting up at 1 am on a Friday night writing the world's longest blog. When I think about those feelings to come, I feel so lost. Home will be thousands of miles, an ocean, and several languages away.

Yes, I realize how selfish I am being complaining about having to return to France. It's ridiculous. However, I also wonder what it would be like if I hadn't come home. I look at all the things my friends in Bordeaux have been doing and I feel so left out. Their lives have been continuing and changing as well. In the three weeks I've been gone, they have improved their language skills, formed new friendships and closer bonds to existing friendships, and experienced the holidays in a different way.

Okay, I know, I want my cake and I want to eat it too. I can't be in two places at the same time. But I feel like whichever route I take, I will be miserable. Glass half empty, anyone? If I stayed at home, I would hate myself forever for staying. However, when I return I will have to go through immersion, home sickness, and possibly culture, shock all over again.

I just wish I could pull myself out of this slump and enjoy my last days in California and my first days back in France rather than wallowing in self-pity. Well, if you're still reading this, you're a trooper, and thanks for listening. I am open to advice.